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 Season 3 Episode 1 Smith and Jones

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PostSubject: Season 3 Episode 1 Smith and Jones   Wed Aug 12, 2015 2:18 am



The Doctor: Judoon platoon upon the Moon.

The Doctor: It's raining, Martha! It's raining on the moon!

Martha: It's bigger on the inside!
The Doctor: Is it? I hadn't noticed.

(The Doctor pulls his sonic screwdriver out of the X-Ray - it is badly burnt)
Martha: ...but it was that woman, Miss Finnigan. It was working for her, just like a servant.
The Doctor: (dejected) My sonic screwdriver...
Martha: She was one of the patients, but...
The Doctor: ...no no, my sonic screwdriver...
Martha: She had this straw, like some sort of vampire!
The Doctor: I love my sonic screwdriver!
Martha: Doctor!?!
(The Doctor chucks the sonic screwdriver over his shoulder)
The Doctor: Sorry.

The following quotes are in chronological order from The Doctor's perspective, not the order they appeared in the show:

The Doctor: If it helps, I can travel in time as well.
Martha: Get out of here.
The Doctor: I can!
Martha: Come on now, that is going too far.
The Doctor: I'll prove it...
(travels back to the morning and bumps into Martha)
The Doctor: Like so (takes off tie), see?
(travels back to evening)
The Doctor: (holding tie up) Told ya.
Martha: No but, but that was this morning! But...did you...? Oh my god, you can travel in time. But hold on, if you could see me this morning why didn't you tell me not to go into work?
The Doctor: Crossing into established events is strictly forbidden. Except for cheap tricks.

Judoon Leader: (After a patient smashes a vase over another Judoon's head) Witness: the crime. Charge: physical assault. Plea: guilty. Sentence: Execution. (Disintegrates the patient with gun)

The Doctor: Have you seen? There are these... things! These, these big space rhino things! I mean, rhinos from space! And we're on the Moon! Great big space rhinos, with guns, on the Moon! And I only came in for my bunions, look! All fixed now, perfectly good treatment, the nurses were lovely, I said to my wife, I said, I'd recommend this place to anyone, but then we end up on the Moon! And... did I mention the rhinos?

(The Doctor is scanning a computer with the sonic screwdriver)
Martha: What's that thing?
The Doctor: Sonic screwdriver.
Martha: Well, if you're not going to answer me properly…
The Doctor: No, really, it is. It's a screwdriver, and it's… sonic. Look.
Martha: What else have you got? Laser spanner?
The Doctor: I did, but it was stolen by Emmeline Pankhurst, cheeky woman.

The Doctor: (as the TARDIS flies off) Welcome aboard, Miss Jones.
Martha: It's my pleasure, Mr. Smith.

Martha: Is there a crew, like a navigator and stuff? Where is everyone?
The Doctor: Just me.
Martha: All on your own?
The Doctor: Well, sometimes I have guests. I mean, some friends travelling alongside me. I had… it was recently… a friend of mine. Rose, her name was. Rose… and… we were together. Anyway.
Martha: Where is she now?
The Doctor: With her family. Happy. She's fine. She… Not that you're replacing her!
Martha: I never said I was.
The Doctor: Just one trip to say thanks. You get one trip then back home. I'd rather be on my own.

Annalise: I am not staying in there to be insulted!
Clive Jones: She didn't mean it, sweetheart, she was just saying you look healthy.
Francine Jones: No, I did not - I said 'orange'.

Morganstern: (on radio) I was there. I saw it happen, and I feel uniquely privileged. I looked out at the surface of the Moon. I saw the Earth suspended in space, and it all just proves Mr. Saxon right. We're not alone in the universe. There's life out there, wild and extraordinary life.

Florence: (to The Doctor) You're quite the funny man and yet, I think, laughing on purpose at the darkness. I think it's time you found some peace.

The Doctor: Isn't that a… magnetic resonance imaging thing? Like a ginormous sort of a magnet? I did Magnetics GCSE. Well, I failed, but all the same.
Florence: A magnet with its setting now increased to fifty thousand Tesla.
The Doctor: Ooh, that's a bit strong, isn't it?
Florence: It'll send out a magnetic pulse that'll fry the brainstems of every living thing within two hundred and fifty thousand miles. Except for me, safe in this room.
The Doctor: But… hold on, hold on, I did Geography GCSE- I passed that one… doesn't that distance include the Earth?
Florence: Only the side facing the moon. The other half will survive. Call it ... my little gift!

The Doctor: How are you feeling? Are you alright?
Martha: Running on adrenaline.
The Doctor: Welcome to my world.

Martha: Haven't you got back-up? You must have a partner or something,
The Doctor: Humans. We're stuck on the Moon running out of air with Judoon and a blood-sucking criminal and you're asking personal questions!

Martha: If they're police, are we under arrest? Are we trespassing on the Moon or something?
The Doctor: No, but I like that. Good thinking. No, I wish it were that simple. They're making a catalogue. That means they're after something non-human. Which is very bad news for me.

Martha: What are Judoon?
The Doctor: They're like police. Well, police for hire. They're more like interplanetary thugs.
Martha: And they brought us to the moon?
The Doctor: Neutral territory. According to galactic law, they've got no jurisdiction over the Earth, so they isolated it. That rain, lightning? That was them, using an H2O scoop.

(Florence Finnegan, flanked by the two Slabs, enter Mr. Stoker's office)
Florence: You see, there are great tests to come and terrible deeds, some of them my own, but if I'm to survive this, I need you.
Mr. Stoker: What are you talking about?
Florence: Blood. Specifically, yours.
(Florence snaps her fingers and the Slabs advance on Stoker)
Mr. Stoker: What are you doing? (The bikers grab him and hold his arms back) What are you doing? Let go of me! What the hell? Let go!
Florence: You see, I was only salt-deficient because I'm so very good at absorbing it. But now I need fire in my veins, and who better than a consultant? With blood full of salty fats and vintage wines and… all those Michelin-starred sauces. (smacks her lips)
Mr. Stoker: Who are you?
Florence: Oh, I'm a survivor, Mr. Stoker. At any cost. (rifles through her handbag and pulls out a drinking straw) Look, I've even brought a straw...

Martha: I promise you, Mr. Smith, we will find a way out. If we can travel to the Moon, then we can travel back. There's got to be a way.
The Doctor: It's not Smith. That's not my real name.
Martha: Who are you then?
The Doctor: I'm the Doctor.
Martha: Me too, if I ever pass my exams. What is it then? Dr Smith?
The Doctor: Just the Doctor
Martha: How do you mean, 'just the Doctor'?
The Doctor: Just... the Doctor.
Martha: What, people call you the Doctor?
The Doctor: Yeah
Martha: Well, I'm not. As far as I'm concerned, you've got to earn that title.

Martha: How many people want to go to the Moon? And here we are!
The Doctor: Standing in the earthlight.
Martha: What do you think happened?
The Doctor: What do you think?
Martha: Extraterrestrial. It's got to be. I dunno, a few years ago, that would have sounded mad. But these days? That spaceship flying into Big Ben. Christmas. Those Cybermen things. I had a cousin, Adeola. She worked at Canary Wharf. She never came home.

(The Royal Hope Hospital has been transported to the Moon)
Martha: It's real. It's really real! Hold on… (goes to open the window)
Julia Swales: Don't! We'll lose all the air!
Martha: But, they're not exactly airtight. If the air was going to get sucked out, it would have happened straight away, but it didn't. So, how come?
(The Doctor pulls back the curtain)
The Doctor: Very good point. Brilliant, in fact. What was your name?
Martha: Martha
The Doctor: And it was ... Jones, wasn't it? (Martha nods) Well then, Martha Jones, question is how are we still breathing?
Julia Swales: Well, we can't be.
The Doctor: Well, for some reason we are, so don't waste my time. Martha, what have we got? Is there a balcony on this floor or a veranda?
Martha: By the patients lounge, yeah.
The Doctor: Fancy going out?
Martha: OK.
The Doctor: We might die.
Martha: We might not.
The Doctor: (smiling) Good. Come on. (points to Julia) Not her, she'd hold us up.

Julia Swales: The rain...
Martha: It's only rain!
Tish Jones: (on phone) Martha, have you seen the rain?
Martha: Why is everyone fussing about rain?
Julia Swales: It's going up.
Tish Jones: (on phone) The rain is going up!

Martha: You never even told me who you are.
The Doctor: The Doctor.
Martha: But what sort of species? It's not every day I get to ask that!
The Doctor: I'm a Timelord.
Martha: Right. Not pompous at all then!

Martha: You're completely mad!
The Doctor: You're right. I look daft in one shoe.

Doctor: Wow! I'm talking to an alien.

The Doctor: Ready?
Martha: No!
The Doctor: Off we go.

Francine: (to Analise) Since when did you watch the news? You can't handle Quizmania!

The Doctor: You're joshing me?
Florence: Afraid not!
The Doctor: I'm talking to an alien?

The Doctor: Something that looks human but isn't.
Martha: Like you apparently.

Doctor: She's as clever as me. Almost!
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